SEX AT 74
I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox,
informing me that I can have sex at 74.
I'm so happy, because I live at number 68.
So it's not too far to walk home afterwards.
And it's the same side of the street
I don't even have to cross the road!
~~~~~
Answering machine message,
"I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call.
I am making some changes in my life.
Please leave a message after the beep.
If I do not return your call,
you are one of the changes."
~~~~~
My wife and I had words, but I didn't get to use mine.
~~~~~
Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your glasses.
~~~~~
Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting.
~~~~~
The irony of life is that,
by the time you're old enough
to know your way around,
you're not going anywhere.
~~~~~
God made man before woman
so as to give him time
to think of an answer
for her first question.
~~~~~
I was always taught to respect my elders,
but it keeps getting harder to find one.
~~~~~
The quote of the month is by Jay Leno:
"With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control,
mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms
tearing up the country from one end to another,
and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks,
are we sure this is a good time to take
God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?"
~~~~~
Aspire to inspire before you expire.
~~~~~
For those that prefer to think that God is not watching over us...
go ahead and delete this. For the rest of us... pass this on...!!
